Things that I have felt uncomfortable doing because they're so middle class, and I never imagined in any angst-ridden, angry adolescence or contrary university years that I would become like my parents:
- buying a 15-year-old Jetta five years ago
- (it got worse though when we discovered Swee'pea's infant car seat only just barely fit into it so we bought a Brand New Car in April)
- renting a nice apartment with two bedrooms when we really we only needed one for us to sleep in
- buying a house (although we did buy the ugliest one we could find in an "up and coming" neighbourhood)
- discovering that the neighbourhood really is up and coming and the assessed value going up like $50,000 in one year
- getting married
- wanting to get married
- getting pregnant
- wanting to get pregnant
- planning to get pregnant (after I was already married - how conformist can you get?)
- getting central air installed when the baby's room is reaching temperatures of more than 30 degrees (of course, the heat wave broke the day we got it installed and we haven't had another hot day since).
But today we add another item to the list. We've hired a cleaning lady (is there a more PC term?) and she's coming today. But she does use only nontoxic, green cleaners... does that lessen the bourgeois reality of having someone else clean your house?
I'm really nervous. I wanted to rush around cleaning up so she doesn't judge us but I held back. We did, however, spend a few hours trying to tidy away some of the clutter so that she can actually clean. I'm still scared that she will judge us.
My mother had various cleaning ladies over the years and at least one of them quit because the house was just too messy. My mom says it was my toothpaste speckles on the mirror that sent her over the edge.
Now that Swee'pea is crawling around I am very aware that we've been intending to mop the kitchen floor for way too long. I won't say how long because I'm ashamed but trust me that it's probably been longer than you'd think. These days it's a good day if we can do a load of laundry, dishes and make dinner without a telephone. We're just not orgnaized or interested in cleaning enough to keep our house clean. Perhaps our slobbiness can be our claim to bohemia?
So we have a cleaning lady. I just pray that she doesn't walk out in disgust.