In the Denist's Chair

Today I went to the dentist. The dental hygienist told me:

• to floss more (big surprise -- I get that every time)
  
• night feedings can cause tooth decay once babies have teeth (Swee'pea has 2 teeth)
• I'm supposed to be brushing Swee'pea's teeth already

I discovered something else for the first time. When you are getting your teeth cleaned you are at the complete mercy of the hygienist. She can subject you to all kinds of verbal torment (to say nothing of the other oral torments). Usually the hygienist chats away about something we may have in common. Typically I enjoy the one-sided chat, or at least I don't mind it, and even contribute my own thoughts here and there when the sharp instruments are removed from my mouth. But not today. Today I was subjected to the thoughts of one [relatively ignorant] mother on how to deal with sleep issues. Which is funny [peculiar not ha ha] because although I have been obsessed with these sleep issues and solving them in the past, I am no longer. I accept that I have a wakeful baby with an intensely curious, sociable and cheerful nature who cannot bear to be left out. I accept that it will likely be years before he sleeps through the night, and probably longer than that before I do. So now we're just in survival mode, or as Bubandpie calls it, "do whatever makes life easier now and let later worry about itself." If you wanted to get all new-agey about it, you could also call it In the Moment Parenting.

When I told the hygienist that Swee'pea is a very wakeful baby and that he sleeps with us and therefore has free access to the tooth-rotting, all-night milk bar, she assumed that it was making me miserable. What I would have said if she hadn't been wielding sharp implements in my mouth follows.

She said, "Don't worry, it gets better." (I'm actually just fine with the way things are. We've figured out how to make things work for our family.)

And "Have you read any books?" (Oh, honey, I think I've just about read them all.)

"Because I read one book and decided not to read any others because I really needed a clear head." (That's a clear head??)

"The one book I read that worked for me was The Baby Whisperer." (I hated that book. It made me feel guilty for our in the moment parenting philosophy, and the author's not even a parent. I won't link to the Amazon page for the book, because in my opinion it is a Bad Book.)

"Have you tried putting him in the crib?" (Yes, we did for months and it was making us all miserable. We've been much happier since we stopped trying.)

"Have you tried lately? You could try again." (No thanks.)

"I have a friend who slept with her son until he was about a year, then she started putting him in the crib. So your son will probably sleep in the crib then." (I actually like sleeping with him. I know that around 4 months I was desperate to get him to sleep in the crib, but I like sleeping with him now. I think we may do it until he's ready for a toddler bed.)

She said more annoying stuff while she poked and prodded my gums but this is just getting boring. I think I may be developing a fear of dentists now.

Oh yeah - and in the spirit of In the Moment Parenting, we may be able to put something in the boy's mouth and make some actions resembling brushing his teeth, but we will definitely not be giving up those night feedings yet. I mean, those teeth aren't even permanent. How important can they be?

* * *

In other news, I'm starting to get more excited about our upcoming trip to South Africa. We already almost have our flights booked. While looking for accommodation I found this unfortunate wording:

... lovely sunny lounge and Victorian fireplace, quaint dining alcove and well-fitted kitchenette oozes old world charm with modern conveniences...

I have an old house. I know how old world charm can ooze. And I don't think I want that on vacation.