Saturday, August 19, 2006

Baby Daze

In late June, I had an epiphany. During that time I'd been feeling very nostalgic for my university days, or more specifically, days of beer, cigarettes and patios on hot days. When I walked with Ezra on a steamy morning past student porches with beer bottles, butts and candles, I would sigh nostalgically. So, one morning I was walking along with Ezra asleep in the stroller and some young people were just coming out... it looked like they'd just gotten up after a fun night out. I mused about how nostalgic I am about those days when, at the time, it was actually pretty stressful pulling all nighters to finish papers and study for exams, and chalk full of anguish caused by unrequited love after unrequited love. It occurred to me that these baby days share something with those student days... maybe the intensity, the constant stress, the lack of structure, I don't know. But I bet I can look forward to looking back on these days with great fondness and an awareness that I didn't appreciate them enough when I was in them. So I decided to try not to put too much emphasis on the sleepless nights and focus on the beauty of spending my days with Ezra and the wonder of the world as he explores it. Obviously I haven't been too successful at this but I'm working on it.

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