Here's what a lazy ass I am.
Some people argue about whether toilet paper rolls should roll over or under. I am too lazy to even put the roll on the holder. (My long-time readers already know this, but I thought I'd repeat myself to save linking to that other post.)
But I AM a detail person, so I have noticed that our cleaning woman (who in fact owns the business so it's not always the same person each time) always puts the roll on the holder, always rolling over (I think), and even folds a nice little point into the tip of the paper. I have discovered that I kind of like having the roll on the holder. But not enough to actually do it myself. (Do I even need to say that Sugar Daddy has never put the roll on the holder? He doesn't even notice where the roll is.)
Last week just before the cleaning woman arrived, I noticed that the roll was getting pretty slim, so I switched it out (prematurely) for a fat new roll, just to get the most bang from our cleaning woman buck. I like to call it strategic thinking.
At my work, we have to pay for a monthly parking pass, something like $20 a month I think. When I went on mat leave, I gave up the monthly pass, and since I've been back (more than two months now), I still haven't quite gotten around to setting up my new parking situation. It's some kind of block. I never seem to remember except outside the office's hours when I'm actually parking or pulling a parking ticket off the windshield.
If you don't pay for the monthly pass, you have to park in the pay and display visitors' lot. However, I also don't pay and display. That costs $12 a day, and a parking ticket, if they give you one, is only $15. I choose to gamble. Mostly, I get about a ticket a week, which is obviously better than paying the astronomical $12 a day.
That said, I have been trying various strategies to avoid parking tickets. First I paid and displayed one day and then continued to display in the hopes that the meter maid wouldn't notice that the date was wrong. That worked for a while, maybe even a week. (And yeah, that now sun-faded ticket is still sitting on my dusty dashboard.)
Then I decided to try displaying the parking tickets I've already gotten on the dashboard to go for the sympathy vote. That worked for a day (or so I thought), but now I've gotten two tickets in a row. I guess that really just shows me for the repeat offender I am.
Sometimes my stupid-ass logic and the effort I put into avoiding a task make me laugh.
What's YOUR procrastination/lazy ass/dysfunctional citzen/lateral thinking/strategic story?