Wednesday, January 10, 2007

I will not whine about last night

I will not whine about last night. I will not whine about last night. I will not whine about last night. I will not whine about last night.


But seriously! Last night sucked.

Ok, you twisted my rubber arm. I will whine about last night.

Swee'pea woke up screaming at 12:30. Well not screaming so much as weeping. We tried burping him, I tried picking him and looking at him, turning the lights on, talking to him. Nothing worked. He just wrapped his little arms around my neck and put his head on my shoulders, and I stroked his back while he sobbed and sobbed. After about 10 minutes or so he finally settled and started nurse. And nurse. And then nurse on the other side. It took him (and consequently us) another half an hour to get back to sleep. (Does anyone know if this was a night terror? Could it have been something else? We debated giving tylenol, but his weeping sounded more like psychological pain than physical...)

I had restless dreams about being with my family and one of us forgetting that Swee'pea was sleeping on a bed somewhere, and forgetting to turn the monitor on, and me giving people shit for forgetting. Then I forgot myself and felt like the world's worst mother, AND like a total shit for being mean to my family.

Then I was woken up at 4:30 by Swee'pea trying to climb over me, soaking wet from his diaper to his armpit. The bed was soaking wet too. His diaper hadn't just leaked, it had filled to capacity and overflowed (thanks to the extended nursing session earlier I guess... I remember when he was four months old he only nursed for four minutes at a time, about every three hours, and he gained weight quickly at this rate). So we changed his diaper and his pajamas. But then he didn't really fall asleep until like 6. He'd sort of fall asleep, then cry out and writhe around, then fall asleep, then cry out and writhe around. On repeat. He eventually settled, and we got a couple hours more sleep.

But I think that night was worse even than the first nights... why??? Did he have a stomach ache? Was it teething pain? Should we not feed him chickpeas anymore? Was it his still runny, snuffly nose? I guess we'll never know. But my bigger question is, will he/we EVER SLEEP AGAIN?


Anonymous said...

no. you will never sleep again. as soon as swee'pea starts sleeping (and he will, oh, i promise you, he eventually will), you will be up every hour wondering when he will wake up. just kidding! things will even out.

btw - sounds like he's about to have some sort of developmental break-through (words, walking, teeth, etc.) - really bad nights usually pre-empt really great milestones.

NotSoSage said...

We had a night like this the night before we threw her first birthday party and I was all stressed out about everything being perfect and I nearly had my own breakdown (and a big fight with Joe) because of it.

I don't think it's a night terror, but I wonder whether kids sense change and stress in their parents more than we think they do, and respond to it. It makes sense to me (although I'm no expert) that it would work itself out during dreams, and I often wondered (before our daughter was better at communicating) whether nights like this were a response to a nightmare.

Perhaps all the activity in preparation for your trip has Swee'pea wondering what's up.

Aliki2006 said...

It sounds to me like he had a night terror. Liam used to have those BIG TIME when he was about your son's age.

And as for the not getting to sleep again, I so remember thinking that. There comes a point with kid-induced sleep-deprivation when you think your life will always be like that. I remember sitting on the armchair in the living room just sobbing from sheer exhaustion. Until Tessa was about a year and a half old she would, 3-4 times/week, wake up at 3:00 a.m. or sometimes 4:00 and just be awake. She didn't want to play, she just was awake. Wide awake. And she wanted to be held. Sometimes I would get her to sleep at 6:00 and just stumble into the shower, get dressed, and head to work. I thought those days would never ever end. Looking back, I don't know how I got through them but I did, and you will too!

I know there is little consolation to be offered when you're so sleep-deprived. But it will get better--it really will.

Mad Hatter said...

Oh Sin,
It will get better. It will. And then it will get bad again and then better again and then bad again. I wish the answers were easy, but they aren't. Miss M sleeps very well now and has for some time. She doesn't sleep the hours we'd like or (IMHO) nearly enough hours, but she sleeps well through the night with only one wake up for quick comfort. It will come, Sin. It will come.

bubandpie said...

From what I've read, night terrors typically occur in the early part of the night (usually two hours after falling to sleep, though when Bub had one it was about three hours later), while nightmares occur in the later part of the night. You'd know for sure it was a night terror if he didn't seem to recognize you - there's often a period where the child is crying but not fully awake.

The thing about those early nights is that the baby is waking up for a simple reason - need for nutrition. Later on, the reasons are more complicated - so the bad nights are worse than ever, but usually they don't happen EVERY night. Here's hoping you have a better night tonight.

cinnamon gurl said...

Thanks, guys. Your comments have made me feel better. I was starting to think he had a sleep disorder or that he would always be like this. Sometimes, especially when sleep deprived, I make everything into catastrophes.

Denguy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Denguy said...

Well, both of mine WERE in their own beds at night and sleeping quite well until Christmas. My wife took two weeks off and was regularly going to bed with Boyo in our bed.

All that work is now undone.

We have the family bed once more