tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post2069148653304679462..comments2023-07-29T09:26:45.820-05:00Comments on Write About Here: knotscinnamon gurlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05363288586285868779noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-70825005845771075902008-08-07T17:09:00.000-05:002008-08-07T17:09:00.000-05:00I don't have any advice to offer on assuaging midd...I don't have any advice to offer on assuaging middle class guilt. It can be a difficult thing to reconcile. But in the incredibly materialistic world we live in, I think it's important to recognize and feel fortunate (even guiltily so) with what we have, rather than constantly wanting to possess more, which seems to be the norm these days.Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05334969603318926031noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-3129646688818762332008-08-07T15:27:00.000-05:002008-08-07T15:27:00.000-05:00Hmmm. If your guilt is causing you physical pain,...Hmmm. If your guilt is causing you physical pain, rather than acting as a motivator (as Mad suggests ... but maybe we can differentiate here between 'guilt' and 'conscience'?) then it's not helping.<BR/><BR/>I get tension headaches, and I used to feel guilty about massages, but ... the headaches stopped. Still, I haven't gone in forever (headaches ... back!) because I feel I don't deserve it? I'm not sure.Mimihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10812707312289852258noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-48873351443949096372008-08-07T13:16:00.000-05:002008-08-07T13:16:00.000-05:00I stalked the comments here yesterday not sure wha...I stalked the comments here yesterday not sure what to say. Sometimes I wonder why we should give up our middle class guilt. It's becoming one of my only motivators. If I lost that I would simply rest content with the state of things and where would that leave us? We are so very much entitled, you know. I'm not sure I want to also be entitled to a guilt-free life. <BR/><BR/>You are doing good work at the shelter, Sin. That's enough. The guilt? It will likely linger always. It's part of who you (and I) are.Madhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13416585771017767796noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-3796549167216959062008-08-06T20:52:00.000-05:002008-08-06T20:52:00.000-05:00I don't know the answer but I would suggest that y...I don't know the answer but I would suggest that you are doing more than many people by volunteering at the drop-in centre. Could you do more? Sure, we all could. But it's something, and it's meaningful. <BR/><BR/>Don't feel guilty for what you have; focus on what you can do with your gifts.Janethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00567374243896229606noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-46482172796611703192008-08-06T18:02:00.000-05:002008-08-06T18:02:00.000-05:00Let me relay a story that my dad told me a couple ...Let me relay a story that my dad told me a couple years ago.<BR/><BR/>My dad used to work at a company that ran nuclear power plants. One of his plants was in a town where a lot of people were poverty-level and the schools sucked. So as an ambassador of his company my dad went to see the superintendent of the schools there. How can we help? my dad asked. The superintendent got all excited and shouted New books! We need new books! Great, my dad said. You got 'em. Now, HOW CAN WE HELP?<BR/><BR/>I've been pondering that one for awhile. <BR/><BR/>Here's the thing. My dad's company was being generous, sure, but it was also acting out of self-interest. It wanted that superintendent to graduate well-educated, hard-working future employees. In the office that day a deal was being made. <BR/><BR/>People understand deals, you know? Trade. I give you a dollar, you give me a cup of coffee. We're all suspicious of people who give "out of the generosity of their heart." So that guy who accused you of oggling the poor people? He was just ascribing a motive to you. (Well, he was trying to hurt you, too.) He figured that in exchange for your time, you were getting -- what? a chance to feel good about yourself? Tell him you're assuaging your middle-class guilt! I bet he'd laugh. Tell him you're appeasing your gods.<BR/><BR/>I wonder if your guilt is actually fear. If you feel like you were given a lot & haven't had to pay for it, then maybe you're worried that someday you will have to pay? OK there ends my armchair psychology!Jennifer (ponderosa)https://www.blogger.com/profile/17712875613623664156noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-82011773722202824152008-08-06T11:28:00.000-05:002008-08-06T11:28:00.000-05:00Oh, I completely believe that about our bodies car...Oh, I completely believe that about our bodies carrying emotional memories. Massage often releases those sorts of feelings, but so can other types of touch. I think that when the masseuse or person delivering the touch has the gift of empathy it is even more powerful. They can draw it from the depths of you out into the open.Kylahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03311014761113076785noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-82180952964071812712008-08-06T10:54:00.000-05:002008-08-06T10:54:00.000-05:00I've lived at both ends of the economic scale and ...I've lived at both ends of the economic scale and I, too, feel guilt--especially at the grocery store where I can buy anything I feel like and the lady with the three kids in front of me has a basket of no-name, items and pasta.<BR/><BR/>I don't know what to do either.11111111https://www.blogger.com/profile/10642068570509276596noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-82842683991135591212008-08-06T10:23:00.000-05:002008-08-06T10:23:00.000-05:00I share your irrational middle-class guilt about p...I share your irrational middle-class guilt about poverty. Interestingly, though, I don't believe <I>you</I> should feel that way, even though at some level I believe <I>I</I> should. <BR/><BR/>But on a conscious rational level I don't think either one of us should feel guilty.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-81426372278582409572008-08-06T08:42:00.000-05:002008-08-06T08:42:00.000-05:00I think that being a massage therapist is an honou...I think that being a massage therapist is an honourable occupation, and hiring a massage therapist - when you need one, which you do - is nothing to feel guilty about. You're keeping someone employed, which is always a good thing.<BR/>You are actually doing something FOR the poor and disenfranchized. This is not something you need to carry guilt about, I think.Beckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13953517447164263617noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31853698.post-37574079320980827992008-08-06T08:04:00.000-05:002008-08-06T08:04:00.000-05:00I also find body work to be highly emotional. I re...I also find body work to be highly emotional. I release all kinds of stuff during massage. It is a little gift to myself so I don't have to carry around with me all the time.<BR/><BR/>Here's what I think - I think you should write those guys words down on a piece of paper -the ones about you coming to look at the poor people - and I think you should burn them. They are burdening you with some lies that you don't need to take inside yourself. <BR/><BR/>There is no artificial separation between us a humans. The things that divide us are the things that we allow to divide us. You know your true purpose for being there and that is all that matters. You have been a help to people - you don't need this guy's blessing. Who knows what is up with him that he has taken up such an attitude, but it certainly has nothing to do with you. <BR/> You are taking good care of yourself and your family - that is both your responsibility but also a way you have of being grateful for your ability to do so. You aren't wasting your treasures. You offer to others what you can - your time, your talent, the ability to listen. Those are not small gifts. You aren't in this to solve the issue of homelessness. That can't be one person's job. You are in this to help real people - and you are.Karenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09390898429089863816noreply@blogger.com